Come and Get It!!!

Once upon a time, I used to be a phenomenal cook. I found trying new recipes a delight, I lovingly stroked new cookbooks, watched Martha Stewart on cable. Then, it all changed...It's dinner time, I am making dinner and well...I'm not enjoying it.

I had H and M. I am now a short order cook. Well, in their mind. Here's why...H likes raw carrots. M doesn't. M likes cooked carrots. H does not. M will eat mashed potatoes. H will not. H and M will eat sliced potatoes baked in the oven after being tossed in oil, salt and pepper. If I throw in an envelope of onion soup so much the better. I've hit one out the ball park.

H will not touch mayo, cream cheese or sour cream but will eat mustard. M will not eat mustard but will eat mayo. So for H, a sandwich has to be made with no mayo, onions and peppers (H loves her peppers and onions just like her big sister but let's not get me started on the big sister's diet because she has celiac and is supposed to not eat gluten but she eats like she doesn't have celiac...oh wait, I wasn't going to get started on that one). Where was I? Oh yes, the ham sandwich...M has to have pickles, mayo, provolone and ham...oh, and it has to be toasted...M will eat PB&J and H will not. Do you see why I like McDonald's? They can sort it all out.

H will eat meat. H LOVES meat. M does not. Getting my beloved son to eat anything besides chicken nuggets or a hot dog requires me to consume a large amount of Motrin. H will eat broccoli. M will not. M will eat macaroni and cheese. H will not. H will eat Mexican Cheese melted on almost anything (well, not a baked potato) but will not touch American, Provolone, Swiss...oh, she will eat Parmesan...in fact, she will eat a mound of shredded Parmesan. I blame a waitress in MA for this oddity...but that's another story. Needless to say, M will not eat the mound of shredded Parmesan but he will eat yogurt. H will not.

I hear the sound of the timer. I will go fetch the chicken, green beans and rice for the husband and me...while I finish off the Amy's skillet lasagna that I caved into making for the Short People. I usually don't do this, I usually have a dinner with much verbal wrestling and threatening but tonight. Two dinners. I'm a short order cook because sometimes the idea of a dinner with no whine while I sip my wine is just too much to resist.