Getting Back

An acquaintance sent me a message about Matthew's injury. I don't know her very well, he son plays on a different AAA team but she is actually concerned about him playing again and she is not his mom...very sweet. I sent her an answer and I guess since I don't know her well, I unburdened my heart. I guess it is a bit like strangers on a train sharing things that you wouldn't tell anyone else. And this is what I said to her, not spoken aloud to anyone...my mama's heart:

Matthew really doesn't share that it hurts. I only know it hurts by the way he carries himself or if someone bumps into him or if he asks to use the cooling machine the Wegner's let us borrow. He won't take anything for it because he doesn't like the way ibuprofen or acetaminophen makes him feel.

It's hard. He was like this the first time he broke it. He won't say anything. He just keeps it inside. It is going to be really hard to watch him get back on the ice. I don't want him getting hurt but hockey is part of him. It's weird, he has wanted to play hockey for as long as I can remember. His dad kept wanting him to play football. It took him two years of pleading to get me to sign him up. I had him in swimming and he hated it. Keith Rowe came to his school and did a thing with his PE class and handed out flyers to try hockey for free and he came home so PROUD of his flyer. I couldn't say no....that's kind of how this is, I can't say no, but I am so leery of him going back to playing...and that is all he wants to do.